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Hard Love
A California Memoir
by Ray Lopez
Foreword by Paula Gill Lopez
Imprint: Resource Publications
From the author of Hard Knocks: Memoir of a Small Moment, Hard Love is the second of three memoirs and picks up where Hard Knocks leaves his readers. It describes the author's immaturity as a young Christian living with his wife in California and his continuing struggles with alcoholism. Like Paul's discussion of his dilemma as a Christian in Romans 7:15, "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." It also follows Lopez's continuing struggle with depression and his wrestling between his conscience and his flesh, reminiscent of T. S. Elliot's lament in The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock, "I should have been a pair of ragged claws / Scuttling across the floors of silent seas." The narrative describes the radical way in which God heals Lopez from alcoholism, which saves his marriage and leads to the beginning of successful academic and professional careers (employment as a federal probation officer, receiving a master's degree in English from UC Berkeley), the birth of a daughter in Berkeley, and the blessings received through becoming part of a local Baptist church. The memoir covers fourteen years living in California and ends with a flight back east to relocate in Connecticut.
Ray Lopez is an evangelist, writer, and poet. He also works as a mitigation specialist in federal death penalty cases after retiring in 2016 from a twenty-six-year career as a federal probation officer. Born in Brooklyn in 1959 and raised on Long Island during the 1960s and 1970s, he journeyed through racism, Catholicism, the counterculture, alcoholism, drug addiction, hospitalization, and jail to find hope in Christ. He earned his master’s degree from UC Berkeley in English in 1988 and has only recently returned to creative writing. Hard Love is his second memoir and his third memoir, Hard Faith, will be coming out soon.
"Ray Lopez gives his raw testimony without sugarcoating. The journey on these pages is one of faith, family, legacy, and difficulty. Transformation comes through struggle, and the struggle has ensured a freedom that Ray now lives and shares, giving the reader hope for any impossible situation. Ray's memoirs will leave you with one conclusion . . . only God could do that!"
--Gina Blaze, codirector of the New England Prayer Center and author of Provoking Thoughts and Clean Love
"Hard Love, Ray Lopez's second memoir, is about the beginnings of an improbable transformation, filled with pain and challenges, but also resilience. This book breaks self-centeredness. Ray has a unique way of crafting his innermost thoughts through prose, poetry, and humor."
--Vincent Carbone, teacher, artist, and author of Distracted Driving . . . Crosses the Line
"A wonderful book, full of life, joys and wounds, losses and recoveries."
--Donald W. Markos, retired professor of English, Cal State East Bay, and author of Ideas in Things: The Poetry of William Carlos Williams